The Benefits of Honesty

The Benefits of Honesty

Okay, let’s look at a question I get asked a lot:

“Why should I be honest? What’s the benefit?”

Weeeellllll….

Hhhmmmm….

Uuuuuuuhhhh…

Because why in the world would you not?

Let’s look at some reasons people come up with…

I would hurt people’s feelings

Yes. You would. You do that anyway.

You worrying in advance about never hurting anyone's feelings is hurting my feelings.

I’m hurt seeing people play small. I’m hurt by people lying. What you think will hurt other people might actually be a great service to them. Or not. The point is, feelings get hurt all the time, no matter what. And I think feelings hurt in an honest exchange can be fixed by an honest exchange.

There’s no real service to the world in being so careful.

Also, you make people smaller in your head than they really are.

As if no one could handle your truth.

Rather cultivate the ability to deal with hurt in a healthy way.

Of course, I am not saying to hurt people’s feelings on purpose.

I would lose some friends

Yes. You will. You already do by lying. I lost friends. In other words: I realised that some people are more nourishing and fun to be with than others. Some of your friends might not be able to handle your honesty. That’s okay. But why would you shrink back down into a fake version of yourself to please people who are afraid of their own selves? Don’t dim your light for the sake of people committed to staying in the dark. Honesty gets you exactly the friends you need. 

I would lose my job

You might. And how bad would that be? If someone fires you for being honest, good for you. Why would you spend half of your awake time in an environment that does not care about you? Why would you repress your true self? No money in the world can compensate for the long-term damage done to yourself by pretending all day. Worse than being fired is firing your own gut feeling and intuition. That takes longer to heal than finding some new way to make money. 

I would not fit into society

Great. I congratulate you! It would be awful to fit into modern society. Most people sleepwalk through life in a daze. Our Society produces more neurotics than ever. More people kill themselves than ever. People are addicted to porn, sugar, booze, screens, or worse. People play games all day. I like healthy individuals taking a stand, growing in power as conscious creators, and actualizing themselves. 

I would lose my partner

Yes. You might show yourself the way you really are and lose your partner. But how big of a loss would that be? Do you enjoy spending your life playing phoney games? If you do, that’s okay. You can go ahead and keep doing that if you like. I don’t know what else to say here. 

Here’s what I think: 

You are going to die.

Really? Yes. Your time here is limited!

That’s the only thing I can guarantee you. 

So, with that being a given, why wouldn’t you be more honest?